Parents, do you think this was rude?

I was watching my boyfriend's little sister last night while her mom went out for the evening. I often do this, it's either me or my boyfriend (her brother) who watches her. He gets paid, but I don't usually because I don't mind it and am very close to the little girl and her mom since I've been with the boyfriend for about 4 years.



Well, a few days ago I had bought a book and an animal play set for her when she came over to surprise her. I haven't gotten her any gifts recently, she does have a lot of toys and a full room but this was just my little surprise to her for starting the new school year. She loved both, she played with and we read the book together, etc.



Well, when her mom comes to pick her up, I had let the little girl borrow my "tangled" dvd to take home and bring back soon. Her mom says, "You keep giving her too much stuff, she has too much already. You need to tone down the gifts with her."



I explained I was letting her borrow the dvd, and the other gifts earlier are the first ones I've given her in months. Why would she be saying this? I am close to both child and mother, we are all really good friends and it gave me an odd feeling like she was being rude. Do you think so?Parents, do you think this was rude?
If I was her, I would be very grateful someone loves my kid as much as I do, and if the girl has too many things, why not donate some old things to charity to free up some space? She should be happy someone cares for her daughter to not even get paid.
Depends on her tone. I often tell people "oh you shouldn't have done that" it is sort of an off way to say "thank you, you are TOO generous." She may be appreciating what you have done for her and her child and this is the way she does it :-)



Don't always assume the worst :-)Parents, do you think this was rude?
Yes, I think it was rude. She should be grateful for everything you do for her. If she wanted to get the point across, there are thankful and lovely ways to do it. I would be a bit stand offish and hesitate the next time she needed my help. But, that's me.
It sounds to me like she was just talking to you as if you were one of her kids.

No, not rude.



Maybe she feels that the 8 year old is getting too spoiled, or that you should be saving your money for yourself.Parents, do you think this was rude?
Quite rude yes you are only being kind.You'd think she'd be glad you make such an enormous amount of effort while she is out letting her hair down for the evening or whatever she is doing.

Maybe she's jealous because you have such a special relationship with her.Maybe she feels guilty because she's out "often" and realises she does not treat her daughter.Something has made her get a chip on her shoulder about it but I have the feeling it's not in the best interest of the little girl and more is something within the mother.

Anyway if you are close to her ask her to explain and maybe there is a reason neither you or I have thought of.
No, I think you may be over doing it. One of the things that parents teach their children is to be content with the things that they have and not to take things that dont belong to them. I remember how my grandmother explained how she taught this to my uncle. She told me that when she would visit her friend, my uncle would play with of all things an oilve oil bottle. The friend told her to let him take it, but she said "No he needs to learn that he should not take things from others homes" The friend kept the bottle and he played with it every time they went to visit and before he left, he would put it back where he got it.



Also even though the child knows you, the child needs to learn not to take things. Sometimes, strangers offer things to children and there are occasions when the strangers are not nice people.
Get paid to take care of his own sister, you are joking right? And you dont mind that you dont get paid coz you are close ? Errr.... closer that her own bro? You must be joking here for a time pass or either you are not in a relationship. Coz no one in THIS EARTH get paid for taking care of own sis or sister in law. THUMBS UP IF YOU ARE NOT ACCEPTING PAYMENT COZ YOU ARE CLOSER.
I might be wrong, but I think the mother doesn't like the idea of her daughter being closer to you than her. I find these type of mothers selfish, and more interested in being needed rather than what's best for her child. My Dad had a friend who I thought was fum and really really admired his confidence and assertiveness. My dad noticed this amd fired him from his business and criticised him behind his back to me.



If not, then she might just be giving her honest opinion.